Depression Recovery

Question:

A friend sent this one to me today and it is kinda funny, however, no one can really be this dumb… For What It’s Worth:  Dear Hillbilly son:  I’m writing this letter slow because I know you can’t read fast.  We don’t live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the  newspaper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your home,  so we moved.  I won’t be able to send you the address because the last West  Virginian family that lived here took the house numbers when they  moved so that they wouldn’t have to change their address. This place  is really nice. It even has a washing machine. I’m not sure it  works so well though: last week I put a load in an pulled the chain  and haven’t seen them since.  The weather isn’t bad here. It only rained twice last week; the first  time for three days and the second time for four days.  About that coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Stanly said it  would be too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut  them off and put them in the pockets.  John locked his keys in the car yesterday. We were really worried  because it took him two hours to get me and your father out.  Your sister had a baby this morning; but I haven’t found out what it  is yet so I don’t know if your an aunt or an uncle. The baby looks  just like your brother…  Uncle Ted fell in a moonshine vat last week. Some men tried to pull  him out, but he fought them off playfully and drowned. We had him  cremated and he burned for three days.  Three of your friends went off a bridge in a pick-up truck. Ralph was  driving. He rolled down the window and swam to safety. Your other  two friends were in back. They drowned because they couldn’t get the  tailgate down.  There isn’t much more news at this time. Nothing much has happened.  Love, Mom  P.S. I was going to send you some money but the envelope was already  sealed.  P.S. And yes, if you get divorced in West Virginia, you are still  brother and sister in Georgia. — For more information about this service, send e-mail to:

Response:

> About that coat you wanted me to send you, your Uncle Stanly said it > would be too heavy to send in the mail with the buttons on, so we cut > them off and put them in the pockets.

As someone who staples his pants pockets when they get a hole, I like this tidbit. Anon-22674, you’ve posted humor stuff here before but I have no idea what your nick is and I don’t see you on the anon# list.. Can you sign your posts, please? GreyAdagio (p/e) — For more information about this service, send e-mail to:

Response: