Depression Recovery

Question:

>>Political party?!  Gotta wonder – what would happen if you mixed manics, >Congress?

Nope. That is the Defense Department.

Response:

> >>Political party?!  Gotta wonder – what would happen if you mixed manics, >Congress? > Nope. That is the Defense Department.

LOL!!! Love, —

Response:

Kukio – I love your attitude!! Political party?!  Gotta wonder – what would happen if you mixed manics,

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Wow what an intellectual catalyst that would be ! – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – >Kukio – I love your attitude!! >Political party?!  Gotta wonder – what would happen if you mixed manics,

Response:

Followups  trimmed. > I think a lot of us would lead simpler, more blessed lives if we just > admitted that we’re Krazy. Think about how many Krazy People there’d be. > We could have our own political party & a chain of pizza parlours.

        Hi Kukio:         Your vision has similarities to one I advocate on alt.surrealism, which is that we all play, develop alternatives of our personality and at least to pretend to believe in absurdities, ideally in an interacting story where we make referance to the delusions of each other.         Having experiented with this form, I can say that it does allow us to experience elements of being different and almost irrationally rejected by the normal (who often appear less than sane once their context is changed) which I suspect is one socially reinforcing aspect of "insanity."         I hesitate to say that we can all become "krazy," there is an artsy craftsy tendency to claim insanity, but I see those who practice it have escapes and seek reassurances which therir friends offer, far different than a state from which there is no escape.  I do think we can cross certain lines and dare things, that parts of ourselves can be developed and that even by pretending the absurd, we allow those tortured by "delusions" to express and better come to terms with theirs because we have created an Alice in Wonderland world in which those who think it’s clever to say "take your medication" have become the misfits.         Or this is (quickly written) a Usenet reality I would like to see.

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I’ve got to admit, accepting my ‘delinquency’ (I’m being facetious) isn’t such a bad idea.  I work with people with all types of disabilities, including mental illness.  With my recent string of diagnoses – major depressive episodes, mood disorder NOS, AD and agoraphobia (some of which I am not entirely in agreement with) – I now laugh and say that I’ve earned my place in this field of work. Lisa – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text ->I’ve had SP all of my life. I cry when the guy gets the girl at the end >of the movie, I cry at happy endings, because I just know I will never >have a successful relationship or a happy ending. >As I grew up, probably as a result of the stress resulting from my SP & >some ‘mild’ sexual abuse activating dormant genes, I developed >Dissociative Disorder, then Panic Disorder, then Major Depression, then >Cyclothymia, & finally manic-depression. I’ve been ill in one way or >another all of my life and I’ve never had anything remotely resembling a >normal life. >Right now I’m house-sitting for my mother, who’s recovering from a liver >transplant at my sister’s house, & it’s the closest thing to having a >home of my own I’ll ever experience. I just started seeing a new p-doc, >who’s got me on Neurontin, 10mg Celexa &, bless her heart, Klonopin, >without which I can’t get through a ‘normal’ day. >I’ve lived with fear for forty-seven years come November 25th, but, I’ll >tell you what, amigas and amigos, I’ve never let it ruin my God-blessed >sense of humor. >I’m Krazy & I wouldn’t have it any other way, because I’m afraid of Sane >People. They walk into Post Offices or schools with automatic weapons >and murder people just for fun. They live in fear, too, but you’ll never >get them to admit it—that’s why they all own guns. >There really isn’t much wrong with being Krazy. You don’t have to buy >into the status quo, you just say : "Don’t look at me, I’m Krazy." >I think a lot of us would lead simpler, more blessed lives if we just >admitted that we’re Krazy. Think about how many Krazy People there’d be. >We could have our own political party & a chain of pizza parlours. >Think about it >—Gone, gone, way gone, all the way gone. Beyond. Kukio Loko

Response:

>Political party?!  Gotta wonder – what would happen if you mixed manics,

Congress?

Response:

I prefer running from office, but thanks anyway – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > Welcome, Kukio Loko!!!!   Great, big, huge hugs to you (if that’s ok) for > your great intro, and sharing your views.  I agree with you on all > accounts…Normies scare the hell out of me!  If you thinking of running for > office, you’ve got my vote! > Dana > I’ve had SP all of my life. I cry when the guy gets the girl at the end > of the movie, I cry at happy endings, because I just know I will never > have a successful relationship or a happy ending. > As I grew up, probably as a result of the stress resulting from my SP & > some ‘mild’ sexual abuse activating dormant genes, I developed > Dissociative Disorder, then Panic Disorder, then Major Depression, then > Cyclothymia, & finally manic-depression. I’ve been ill in one way or > another all of my life and I’ve never had anything remotely resembling a > normal life. > Right now I’m house-sitting for my mother, who’s recovering from a liver > transplant at my sister’s house, & it’s the closest thing to having a > home of my own I’ll ever experience. I just started seeing a new p-doc, > who’s got me on Neurontin, 10mg Celexa &, bless her heart, Klonopin, > without which I can’t get through a ‘normal’ day. > I’ve lived with fear for forty-seven years come November 25th, but, I’ll > tell you what, amigas and amigos, I’ve never let it ruin my God-blessed > sense of humor. > I’m Krazy & I wouldn’t have it any other way, because I’m afraid of Sane > People. They walk into Post Offices or schools with automatic weapons > and murder people just for fun. They live in fear, too, but you’ll never > get them to admit it—that’s why they all own guns. > There really isn’t much wrong with being Krazy. You don’t have to buy > into the status quo, you just say : "Don’t look at me, I’m Krazy." > I think a lot of us would lead simpler, more blessed lives if we just > admitted that we’re Krazy. Think about how many Krazy People there’d be. > We could have our own political party & a chain of pizza parlours. > Think about it > —Gone, gone, way gone, all the way gone. Beyond. Kukio Loko

Response:

> > Think about it

Kukio, Immediately after reading your last line, I thought "Right on Kukio". Then I wondered:  "Has Kukio been in my brain purloining my thoughts & feelings?" > I’ve had SP all of my life. I cry when the guy gets the girl at the >end of the movie, I cry at happy endings, because I just know I >will never have a successful relationship or a happy ending

The boy-gets-girl things are tough.  Even the dog-saves-little-boy, etc. etc.   My first movie cry came during "The Sound of Music".  I was 18 and my girlfriend gave me a really strange look when she saw me trying to fight the tears. Guess I wasn’t man enough for her.  That was the first cry and wasn’t the last.  The most recent was yesterday. I have "masked" my SP so well that only my therapist knows of it (I hope). Most of my income during my life has come from, get this, SELLING one thing or another.  If they only knew that inside I was saying "Don’t make me sell this to you, just buy it, then leave me alone."  Rather strange choice for a livelihood when I didn’t really want to be around "them".  Funny thing of it is, the SP helped me sell.  No matter what I was selling, within a month or to I would be the top salesman.  Really ticked off the old timers. I usually ended up in sales because I could call my own shots.  I was my own boss.  Almost all of my experiences as an "employee" have been bad.  Not all, but most.  But I have only been fired once.  As it turned out the boss had such a bad drug habit it was fire me or the other guy so he could pay for his habit.  The other guy turned out to be a drug dealer.  I just couldn’t figure out why I was out doing all of the work while the new guy and the boss sat in the office.  Obviously, they were snortin’ coke.  Stupid me. The anxiety is always inside.  Not much joy in life when you don’t want to participate in it.  But there are at a few people I feel comfortable around.  Meantime, just walking into the grocery store is a pain…. people everywhere.  I try to time my trips outside so that I will have minimum confrontation with the rest of the human race. I don’t think I have it as bad as you, but I certainly understand. My therapist tells me I should take a walk every day.  She says I need to be more active (physically).   She’s right but I tell her I think I know what she is really up to.  I’ll see people on those walks.   And it is not in my nature to ignore someone once we make eye contact (that’s part of masking the SP).  And of course the inevitable chit chat will then ensue.  It’s a small town (pop. 2,416)  so I can’t ignore the people I see simply because I don’t know them.  I DO know them. > There really isn’t much wrong with being Krazy. You don’t have to buy > into the status quo, you just say : "Don’t look at me, I’m Krazy."

Can’t remember the title but in a book I read the author claimed that the Foxes (normals) were guarding the chickens (crazies). Cluck, Cluck. Mike

Response:

Welcome, Kukio Loko!!!!   Great, big, huge hugs to you (if that’s ok) for your great intro, and sharing your views.  I agree with you on all accounts…Normies scare the hell out of me!  If you thinking of running for office, you’ve got my vote! Dana – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> I’ve had SP all of my life. I cry when the guy gets the girl at the end > of the movie, I cry at happy endings, because I just know I will never > have a successful relationship or a happy ending. > As I grew up, probably as a result of the stress resulting from my SP & > some ‘mild’ sexual abuse activating dormant genes, I developed > Dissociative Disorder, then Panic Disorder, then Major Depression, then > Cyclothymia, & finally manic-depression. I’ve been ill in one way or > another all of my life and I’ve never had anything remotely resembling a > normal life. > Right now I’m house-sitting for my mother, who’s recovering from a liver > transplant at my sister’s house, & it’s the closest thing to having a > home of my own I’ll ever experience. I just started seeing a new p-doc, > who’s got me on Neurontin, 10mg Celexa &, bless her heart, Klonopin, > without which I can’t get through a ‘normal’ day. > I’ve lived with fear for forty-seven years come November 25th, but, I’ll > tell you what, amigas and amigos, I’ve never let it ruin my God-blessed > sense of humor. > I’m Krazy & I wouldn’t have it any other way, because I’m afraid of Sane > People. They walk into Post Offices or schools with automatic weapons > and murder people just for fun. They live in fear, too, but you’ll never > get them to admit it—that’s why they all own guns. > There really isn’t much wrong with being Krazy. You don’t have to buy > into the status quo, you just say : "Don’t look at me, I’m Krazy." > I think a lot of us would lead simpler, more blessed lives if we just > admitted that we’re Krazy. Think about how many Krazy People there’d be. > We could have our own political party & a chain of pizza parlours. > Think about it > —Gone, gone, way gone, all the way gone. Beyond. Kukio Loko

Response:

I’ve had SP all of my life. I cry when the guy gets the girl at the end of the movie, I cry at happy endings, because I just know I will never have a successful relationship or a happy ending. As I grew up, probably as a result of the stress resulting from my SP & some ‘mild’ sexual abuse activating dormant genes, I developed Dissociative Disorder, then Panic Disorder, then Major Depression, then Cyclothymia, & finally manic-depression. I’ve been ill in one way or another all of my life and I’ve never had anything remotely resembling a normal life. Right now I’m house-sitting for my mother, who’s recovering from a liver transplant at my sister’s house, & it’s the closest thing to having a home of my own I’ll ever experience. I just started seeing a new p-doc, who’s got me on Neurontin, 10mg Celexa &, bless her heart, Klonopin, without which I can’t get through a ‘normal’ day. I’ve lived with fear for forty-seven years come November 25th, but, I’ll tell you what, amigas and amigos, I’ve never let it ruin my God-blessed sense of humor. I’m Krazy & I wouldn’t have it any other way, because I’m afraid of Sane People. They walk into Post Offices or schools with automatic weapons and murder people just for fun. They live in fear, too, but you’ll never get them to admit it—that’s why they all own guns. There really isn’t much wrong with being Krazy. You don’t have to buy into the status quo, you just say : "Don’t look at me, I’m Krazy." I think a lot of us would lead simpler, more blessed lives if we just admitted that we’re Krazy. Think about how many Krazy People there’d be. We could have our own political party & a chain of pizza parlours. Think about it —Gone, gone, way gone, all the way gone. Beyond. Kukio Loko

Response:

SP. That’s Social Phobia to you normies.   —K. L. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – > I’ve had SP all of my life. I cry when the guy gets the girl at the end > of the movie, I cry at happy endings, because I just know I will never > have a successful relationship or a happy ending. > As I grew up, probably as a result of the stress resulting from my SP & > some ‘mild’ sexual abuse activating dormant genes, I developed > Dissociative Disorder, then Panic Disorder, then Major Depression, then > Cyclothymia, & finally manic-depression. I’ve been ill in one way or > another all of my life and I’ve never had anything remotely resembling a > normal life. > Right now I’m house-sitting for my mother, who’s recovering from a liver > transplant at my sister’s house, & it’s the closest thing to having a > home of my own I’ll ever experience. I just started seeing a new p-doc, > who’s got me on Neurontin, 10mg Celexa &, bless her heart, Klonopin, > without which I can’t get through a ‘normal’ day. > I’ve lived with fear for forty-seven years come November 25th, but, I’ll > tell you what, amigas and amigos, I’ve never let it ruin my God-blessed > sense of humor. > I’m Krazy & I wouldn’t have it any other way, because I’m afraid of Sane > People. They walk into Post Offices or schools with automatic weapons > and murder people just for fun. They live in fear, too, but you’ll never > get them to admit it—that’s why they all own guns. > There really isn’t much wrong with being Krazy. You don’t have to buy > into the status quo, you just say : "Don’t look at me, I’m Krazy." > I think a lot of us would lead simpler, more blessed lives if we just > admitted that we’re Krazy. Think about how many Krazy People there’d be. > We could have our own political party & a chain of pizza parlours. > Think about it > —Gone, gone, way gone, all the way gone. Beyond. Kukio Loko

Response: